Josh McPake, the great wanderer of Scottish and English lower league football, graced this blessed Earth on the 31st of August, 2001. Standing at a rather typical 6 foot (or 1.83 metres, for those of us living in the 21st century), he weighs 11 stone (equivalent to around 70 kilos of haggis).
Blessed with the versatility to be deployed as a forward, but generally, seen haunting the right-wing, he currently plies his trade for the highfalutin' St Johnstone. Some might know number 24 as a regular fixture in the team. Astonishingly, his current market value is almost identical to the price of a decent second-hand car, standing at a whopping €50k, or, in the more familiar tongue of Her Majesty's currency, around £43k, according to the font of all knowledge, Transfermarkt.
This seasoned journeyman started his professional journey with none other than Rangers, where he first stepped onto the turf in July 2017. Yet, perhaps feeling a wave of wanderlust, McPake wasn't long till he was off on his first stint on loan, this time to Dundee in August 2019.
As the nomadic life seemed to suit him just fine, this fine lad then moved on his merry way to Greenock Morton in September 2020. A quick nip down to England saw him join rank and file at Harrogate Town in January of 2021.
Never one to collect moss, his ever-spinning compass pointed back to Scotland, and a sojourn at Queen's Park fetched him a tally of 3 goals from 27 rather gruelling games in the 2022-23 season. Alas, his prodigal return to Rangers in June 2023 was not meant to be permanent.
After an eerily omitted destination for his next adventure in September 2023, McPake was spotted gracing the greens of Stirling Albion in February 2024. But oh, the call of the Premiership was too strong to resist, and he found himself back in the big leagues with St Johnstone in July 2024.
McPake has contributed a single goal in his six appearances this current season (2024-2025), giving the Saints' fans a glimmer of hope that his nomadic past may have taught him a trick or two about finding the back of the net-- not that they would dare to dream.
